Samwise, get over yourself!

Man are you a stuffy hobbit! I mean, where do you get off making fun of all your friends? Excuse me, that's right. YOU DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS BECAUSE YOU'RE TOO BUSY CRITISIZING EVERYONE WHO TALKS TO YOU! If you were stuck in a hot and uncomfertable mountain and your only friend was a dragon (which, I'm happy to report, was not killed afterall) then you would not be so picky! Frodo can't be that bad! I mean, he seems to think that you are his loyal friend and obviously treats you such! AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE THAT HE HAD BEEN CARRYIED OFF BY SOME ELF DOOD BECAUSE HIS WOUND WAS SO BAD?!!?? Man are you pathetic! I can't believe that someone would be so cruel and unfeeling. Why, just yesterday I had to help Smokey (that's my best friend, the dragon) through another crisis. He's got some self-image problems. He thinks he's fat. But that's not what I'm here to talk about anyway. You should be happy for adventure too! I'm cooped up here and all I can do is read what you stupid idiots write and dream...dream that one day...one day, that will be me!
And so what if the Shire is nice! How do you know it's the best if you've never been anywhere else?! Ever think about that?
Plus, what are you doing writing in my journal? HUH? I mean, you don't just pick up some random book that says, "My Dark Thoughts, by Sauron's Kid" and just start writing in it! It's my journal!!!!!!!! But...I guess you can continue...since the only other thing I do is talk Smokey through crisis's and that's, well, not really fun. But I guess it doesn't matter anyway since I don't think you'll be able to read what I write. I think Journal Clones work only one way and obviously I can read what you guys write. So you won't be able to read this, I think. Plus, I've already written some entries in this journal and I KNOW you wouldn't have written in it if you could read those...he he he. So I have power. HA!