The Angry Barmaid, by Strider

These hobbits have not been easy to live with, lemme tell ya.

I had just stopped in at the Prancing Pony to have a bit of fine ale and rest myself. There was a new barmaid there that I noticed. She was very pretty and caught my eye as soon as I stepped in the dark room. Hastely, she dealt with another customer and sauntered up to me with a mischievous smile forming on her lips!

I am a very quiet and mysterious person so all I could do was smile to myself as she flirted with my hooded figure. She had a shapely figure shown off by the fitted but plain gown of a barmaiden. Tightly wound around her waist was a dirty apron with stains of previous spills. She smelled of strong ale and hard work.

She smiled and batted her eyelashes at me.

"Please fetch me an ale, lass" I said huskily.
"You needn't call me lass, sir. I am today but twenty and three. I am young no longer" she said, as she threw back her hair and devilishly glared at me.
"Pardon the miss wording, my lady, but one would not guess that you held such an age by your smile. I was mislead" I said, wishing she would just bring me the ale.
"La, sir, but you compliment me too much! Not that I object..." she said, smiling again.
"The ale, madame" I tactfully reminded her.
"Oh...! I never!" she said angrily. She had not, obviously, picked up on my wishes to be left alone. Oh well. All mortal girls are like this. However, Elves are a different matter...

I brought out my pipe and carefully lit it. I relaxed and put my feet up. I was in a dark corner, away from the drunken men and hobbits who most often ocupy this establishment. I liked being in my solitude. Plus, with a wall to my back, I would never have any surprises and could watch the movements of all in the room. I saw three dirty old men laughing over their spirits and talking of younger days. I saw a husband and wife, eating a quiet and peaceful dinner in a corner. I saw a group of travelers, eating, drinking, singing-so merry to be alive...and drunk, for that matter. I saw the barmaid filling a glass with ale. She had a dark look on her face (one I assumed to be my fault. Oh well, I can't help wanting solitude) and was talking rapidly to an older barmaid (again, I assumed to be the object of this disscusion since the older one kept glancing at me and giving me these nasty looks).

Then, these four soaking wet hobbits stepped in. They immidiately caught my attention. These were the hobbits that I was looking for. Gandalf had asked me to keep an eye out for them and to help them when I found them.

One of the hobbits went up to the bar and inquired about something to the barkeeper. He looked dissapointed and a little confused after their disscusion was over and he joined the other three hobbits to tell them the news. Their faces dropped slightly as they recieved it. I guessed that the hobbit had been inquiring about Gandalf. I watched as they removed their sodden cloaks and moved over and sat at a table not far from mine.

The barmaid approached and placed a full tankard of ale in front of me.

"Anything else you'll be wantin?" she asked coldly.

"Just put this on my tab, please" I said, not removing my eyes from the hobbits. This seemed to annoy her as she then went busstling off muttering something about an ungrateful man.

The hobbits started to drink. It's a funny thing, watching a hobbit slowly get drunk. At first, they seem to deny the possibility, saying to themselves, "A little ale does not affect me!" and then they drink more and more, still relying on that thought. Then, they have become fully drunk and are suddenly very merry. They began dancing and singing with the other men happily. I was about to intervene when one of the hobbits did a very risky thing...he dissapeared.

I know hold myself responsible for the hasty and unsafe few days that we had after that.

You see, the hobbit (which had turned out to be Frodo) had slipped on "The Ring" and had, thereby, dissapeared. This had attracted beasts that are commonly known as Ring Wraiths. These are Nazgul Knights and they are very dangerous. Each of the many of them yearn for the ring and would do anything to have it. That is why, when I spoke to the hobbits later that night, I explained the need for us to be packing up and leaving.

We were in some pretty big danger.